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The New Year is upon us but I find myself looking backward. I suppose I’m reflecting on the events of 2016 and wondering where the year went. Each year passes by so quickly. Some of the highlights of 2016 were health issues for me; viewing the premiere of HBO’s Risky Drinking; going to New York City; spending craft time with my great-grandkids; hiring an aide; and, Riley is still immortal. I have plans for 2017. At the beginning of every year I make plans. Lots and lots of plans. So many plans that no human being could complete them in a series of New Years. I don’t do resolutions – I do plans. In short, I bite off far more than I can chew. I’m going to try to be more realistic this year. (Does that mean I’m making a resolution?) In the year 2017 I will be working with a partner to create a documentary film about living life inside the chaos of a loved one’s alcoholism. It will be a collection of home videos from volunteers willing to document the complexity of their lives. There will ...

Twas the night before Christmas and all thru the house Not a creature was stirring not even a mouse;   The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,             In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there. The children were nestled all snug in their beds,             While visions of household peace danced in their heads; And mamma in her kerchief, fell quickly to sleep,             And I with my nightcap, h ad just settled in to finish my bottle of scotch; I had dozed off for a minute when out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, I sprang from my recliner to see what was the matter.   Away to the window I flew with a staggering stumble,             Tore the ottoman and pulled the curtains off the window. The moon, on the breast of the new-fallen snow,    ...

Did you watch the Risky Drinking film? What did you think of it? I liked the film very much. The fact that I advised HBO through an entire segment makes me unable to give an impartial opinion. Even though I like the film, after watching it for the second time, I realized that I am desensitized to the yukky parts of alcoholism. Hospitalization to detox and watching someone’s hands shaking is a bit ho-hum to me. For me the concern was the 15-year-old boy taking care of his alcoholic father and the wife of the end-stage alcoholic who helps her husband go back into his job while in a drunken state. Those were the scenes that made me want to jump out of my seat and scream at the TV. Let’s break this down by segment. In the first one, we see a young woman, Kenzie, who doesn’t do much drinking during the work week so that she feels comfortable binge drinking on the weekends. I know this is considered to be “fun” in her generation. But, I can’t understand why someone purposely gets drunk and b...

It’s THAT time of year again. You know the one where everyone is full of love and kindness, hope and dreams, and, let’s not forget, jolly laughter. Instead of saying “Have a nice day,” you now hear “Have a Merry Christmas!” Those politically correct will say “Happy Holidays!” But for many of us, we just go with the flow while the words repeated in our heads are “Just let me get through this.” Christmas and the holiday season is not always a joyful time in some of our lives. We go through the motions, such as buying the gifts, sending the cards, making the cookies and kissing under the mistletoe. We’d rather be curled up on the sofa with the dog, cat and a good book with the sounds of “Hotel California” coming from the stereo. No tree, gifts, egg nog, or any other such reminders of the season. It may seem a bit harsh to the hardy, enthusiastic holiday lovers, but many people just want to be left alone. These are the people who have found themselves in a position of being alone during th...

NOW AVAILABLE!! Surviving the Chaos Caregiving the Caregiver It's time to take care of yourself. Sometimes we forget that we are even a part of the human race. I often feel that my life, needs, desires are not elements to be considered. The alcoholic is the only person that matters. NO MORE! I am important. My life does matter. I'm not willing to give up my health or dreams to make sure that someone else is protected. The most important person to take care of in my life is ME. Surviving the Chaos explains how to take the leap from being simply a caregiver to being a caregiver to myself first. Learn about physical, mental, financial health, time management and how to discover who you really are and what you want. Through worksheets and explanations, this book is a one-of-a-kind must have for anyone who is caregiving an alcoholic or simply has one in their life. To order now:  https://www.createspace.com/6727428 or go to Amazon.com and see all the books written by me and availabl...

After I finished writing the new book, Surviving the Chaos , I sent it to the proofreader to find all my typos, inconsistencies and other errors. I had titled the book and added a phrase, Caretaking the Caregiver. As soon as the proofer received my manuscript, she immediately telephoned me. “We have a problem,” she says. Then she patiently went on to explain to me the difference between a caretaker and a caregiver. Oops… I had made a big mistake and needed to make a few (a lot) of changes. Well… that’s why I hire a proofreader. Caretaker – A person employed to look after a public building or a house in the owner’s absence such as a janitor, custodian, superintendent, maintenance man/women, etc. Caregiver – A family member or paid helper who regularly looks after a child or a sick, elderly or disabled person. As I’m making the changes, my mind drifts off (more so than usual) and I start thinking about caretaking and caregiving. Hmmm… sometimes it feels as though I’m more of a caretaker ...

I’ve been in New York City for the past couple of days. I was invited to the preview showing of the HBO film, Risky Drinking. I happily put Riley into a nursing home for respite and headed off to take a bite out of the Big Shiny Apple! I’ll write about the trip in another post because for now – it’s all about Risky Drinking. There were four subjects who consented to have their lives filmed over a course of time. Kenzie is a young professional who manages to keep her life in order during the work week and then “lets go” on the weekend. What starts out as fun and games always seems to end up with tears and apologies. Mike moves to St. Thomas , Virgin Islands , to start a new career and a new life. His teenage son comes to visit him and ends up “taking care” of his father. After the boy returns home, Mike attempts to reconcile with his wife, but the attempt ends in disaster. Rhonda uses alcohol as a coping mechanism and participates in a weekly happy hour with three other women. One of...

From time to time you've read about my collaboration with HBO for their documentary film on alcoholism. RISKY DRINKING An HBO documentary film Premieres December 19, 2016 at 8:00 p.m. (Eastern and Pacific Time) This film challenges viewers to recognize and evaluate their own risky drinking behaviors. The film follows four case studies who are in a broad spectrum of risky drinking stages. Addiction experts explain the science behind the alcohol abuse disorder and provide statistics about its prevalence and hazards. RISKY DRINKING was directed by Ellen Goosenberg Kent; produced by Ellen Goosenberg Kent and Perri Peltz; segment director, Perri Peltz; supervising editor, Geeta Gandbhir; editor, Alex Keipper. For HBO: senior producer, Sara Bernstein; executive producer, Sheila Nevins. A MUST-SEE FOR ALL MY READERS! Other  HBO  playdates: Dec. 22 (10:10 a.m., 11:50 p.m.), 24 (1:15 p.m.), 27 (5:15 p.m.) and 30 (3:00 p.m., 2:15 a.m.), and Jan. 8 (1:35 p.m.) HBO2 playdates: Dec. 21 (2:...